There's nothing like being organised, and sadly no matter how hard I try I am nothing like organised. I go through phases were I will make lists of what needs to be done, with the full intention of crossing items of as I go along but I soon lose interest and go back to my haphazard ways. I thought however I had the yearly event of "Mass hysterically checking of bank accounts to see if the people at the London Marathon have cashed your cheque" or "MHCOBATSITPATLMHCYC" for short? sorted this time around.
For those of you not in the know, the London Marathon is many times over subscribed, unless you can run under 3 hours (for a male of my age) you are considered to have about a 1 in 4 chance of getting a place. They officially inform you if you have been one of the luckily ones in December but experience says if your cheque is cashed a week after the closing date your in.
Anyway back to MHCOBATSITPATLMHCYC. Last year I had set up an internet banking account so I could check instantly if I had been granted a place. Smart. I was just as clever with my passwords, I didn't want to use my generic passwords, access to my financial information had to be a little tougher to access so two total new passwords were created. I am sure you can see where this is going, a year on and I haven't a clue what the passwords are. 3 guess and you are locked out, please phone this number to confirm you identity and we will provide you access once more. How annoying.
So the number is called and the guy at the other end start reeling off his script, can you confirm your full name and the reference number we gave you when you screwed up last time... I am sorry Mr FakeSwede but it appears no transaction have taken place in the last month for me to be able to confirm your identity, you have two choices either you can use your card and phone back at a latter date, or we can send you a letter to take to your local branch, which option would be best for you? Seeing as my local branch is a short plane trip away I decide a purchase on the card is called for. I know I have £29.16 in the account and that the cheque to the marathon is 27 pounds so I have just over two pounds to spend. A packet of polos it is then, slightly embarrassing it use a debit card of such a small sum, especially when the magnetic strip cant be read and the numbers have to be typed in, but needs must.
I rush home clutching my till receipt and rephone the bank "can you confirm your full name and the reference number we gave you when you screwed up last time... I am sorry Mr FakeSwede but it app..." but what about the packet of polos? ohh it takes 3 to 4 working days for those th show. Nothing to do but wait for Monday by which time the cheques will have been cashed for the lucky ones.
Monday takes a long time in arriving, but finally i get the chance to phone. A truly bored script reader answers and the usual blurbed is spoken but this time transactions have been taking place, thank you polos.
"Can you tell me the value of cheque number 98?"
"27 pounds"
"Thank you, and can you tell me what your overdraft limit is please?"
"I have an overdraft? you mean i didn't have to embarrass myself in front of a queue of people being a packet of polos on a debit card what didn't want to work?"
"We can move onto the next question if you prefer?"
"I think it would be for the best"
"..... Okay Mr FakeSwede, what I going to do is send you a letter in the post. You need to take this letter to your local branch where they can confirm your identity"
"Arrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhh!!!!!!"
After an hour of stomping around trying to work out which question or questions I had answered incorrectly it suddenly dawned on me. How did she know about cheque number 98? There could only be one reason, because it had been cashed. Doom and gloom changed into bouncing around the apartment with a stupid grin all over my face. I was in, I will be running the London Marathon of the 17th of April 2005.